As children in the foster care system, my brothers and I weren't treated any different from most of the kids in stories you hear of from those who were in foster care. I had 3 biological brothers. Now, I have 2. During foster care, we were split up and placed into different homes. Oh - how we hated that. I'm the oldest brother. While we were separated, we each had our individual experiences, and I'll never grasp some of the horrific things that my brothers went through on a personal level. But while we were separated, I knew, however, that I absolutely had to protect the 1 brother I could while split up. Some call it animal nature. I call it love (This is also why it's important for you to be passionate about anything in which you invest).
As a leader, intentional or unintentional, there are going to be times when you are forced into a situation, and you have to respond. In some cases, you have to react. In those cases, there better be something innate within you, that allows you to react in a wise manner. It's not always what you choose to do or the outcomes you expected. However what you absolutely cannot do is quit. Stop trying. Appear weak. These qualities falsify your claim as a leader.
If adoption taught me anything, it taught me that I have a 'quiet' strength, and when I need to call on it, the story I just shared with you always comes to the forefront of my mind. I would never claim to be a master in the art of leadership. There are others out there, however, that also give great insight into leadership and can give additional advice and wisdom.
I am simply saying that you can take as many classes as you want. You can listen to the best and the brightest. You can read many books on leadership. But - when push comes to shove - when your back is against a bed of nails, you must know how to rise. One wrong move and you're bleeding. And your reaction has to be something that's innate and hardwired within you.
Otherwise, you're intentionally hurt.